Challenges help define you, but don’t break you

What we have face us and how we overcome them, are true testaments to the type of person we are.

I was recently “seeing” a guy, I use the term seeing very loosely because we fell quickly before he left for a long distance gallivant.  I have a hard time writing this blog because I feel like the last ohhh 9 months were a bit of joke… it was like having a pen pal  you had known only for 3 months… instead of signing “write soon” we wrote “I love you”….which don’t get me wrong I easily could say I didn’t love him…but that wouldn’t be true…..  I have written many blogs about love…  I know I wear my heart on my sleeve that is because I care for a lot of people far before they care for me…. Call me emotional, call me hopeless but you can’t call me uncaring. I would rather wear my heart on my sleeve then not wear a heart at all. But now that, that is said…we can move on…. for the purpose of this blog I will call it a relationship..but don’t think it was…. it was nothing of the sorts…  It was a good time, good stories, great friend…. he was there when I needed him most, some of the time….  he was the friend  I needed at the time I needed….
There were things I regretted during that time, but that only taught me how to change my future since I can’t change my past.  I guess you could say it was a mutual ending only because I wasn’t willing to “wait”  around for him to figure out how awesome I am… I know I am awesome, but I don’t need to wait around for someone to think and figure it out….. the person that is going to be worth my time will realize that from the get go and get to constantly experience it…. I sit and think about what a future could have been…  it all would have been a lie…a complete  180 from the life I lead now…  and I know I said I was willing…  and I would be, but I don’t think I could have been for him…  because he wasn’t giving as much as I was giving… and healthy relationships require give and take… So I guess I get to thank him for trying to over think  things that ended the relationship…  I am happier, which is hard because I was happy all along…  I have since met people that show me I can have the type of religious/cultural balance that I want, because I want, not because I have to…. The give and take is there…or has the potential to be there…either way it will be fair.

Life is a ongoing lesson, Moral of this lesson:

Go with your gut-–Your instincts, your family and friends usually are correct, no  matter how much you want to deny it…..
Listen to your heart ..&  mind.…Don’t put all of your heart into something your head isn’t into
Love works the way it is suppose to…  sometimes you don’t realize it right away
Tears are a waste… don’t cry because in  the end… it just wasn’t meant to be and you can’t change that.

 This is what I want, what everyone should be allowed  to have 100%  of the time:

Happy Living & Hopefully Loving

When the road to home is covered with bushes..

You know when life gives you hurdles you are to get over them, well what if you don’t know how?

Wanting a guy to notice you with out being “that” girl
Things to consider is what you think when you see someone, what gets your attention negative and positive. You need to take how you want to be seen, and act it out by seeing other people!

In Life
Your goal is to leave a positive impression on this person. The best way is to smile, let him see who you are. Stand with good posture and have good eye contact. These things are going to show that you are confident and that is exactly what every woman wants a man to take from it. Don’t ever be afraid to go after what you want, worse case scenario is that you realize it may not be something you want after all.

At Work
Dress to impress, put together vs. bed hair, positive verse negative. Do your job you know your going to get more positive attention if your doing what you are suppose to be doing and doing it well. Ask for input without seeming stupid, it is a fine line for sure, but think about it if you ask for to check something he can check to see how awesome you are or he can teach you a new thing..it is a win win. Be a happy person, combat the normal work breeding grounds for angry feeling by being a source of cheer. (With being the happy person though comes some things to watch out for people will like you and gossip with you so try and stay Switzerland). Interact when appropriate this will show your knowledge and have him see you as person

At the bar or gym
SMILE 😀 It tells a guy what kind of a person you are with out having to say a thing, this is a way to say your open with out the fear of getting rejected. It is not a need for a ear to ear smile, just a small coy smile that says I am here. After a smile it is about eye contact with out being creepy!
Be sure that his attention is what you want. Don’t try to get a guy to look your way, you want attention and you want to feel good about yourself.But don’t be loud he is going to think your weird and not approachable! Being yourself is good but don’t do something crazy to get his attention! You don’t want to lead someone on like a puppy taken out for a walk. You could end up in a very awkward or uncomfortable situation.

Remember it is about you liking someone enough to want their attention, this doesn’t mean you get to lose yourself in the process.Be yourself. Everyone probably says this, but it’s true. No guy wants a girl that pretends like she is something she is not. Show him that you are a good friend. Listen to the music he listens to. Just don’t come on too clingy. No boy wants a girl who just follows him around all day. In addition, if you want to find out more about him, don’t stalk the poor guy. Just find out about him from his friends you trust. For example, ask them about his likes and dislikes, what music he is into, what concerts he goes to, if he likes anyone, etc. Be confident in yourself, and it will show that you are an amazing person. Don’t be someone you’re not. You want him to like you for you.


Once You Get the attention…..now what

Hang out with him often but not too often ; you don’t always want to be hanging around because you might look like an annoying bug that’s always around and never goes away. Try to start a conversation about an interesting topic, for example, if you’re at a football game, ask confidently but cutely, “Did I miss any action?”. This will tell him that you want to know about the game, but also you want to get his opinion, so he will automatically talk to you about the game (or other topics) the whole game. Start slowly like a movie or party try not to make it so noticeable cause he might not be interested.
FLIRTTTTT 🙂 best part of courting~! Do it as much as you want, but remember that too much flirting especially with other guys will likely get him to take notice, but perhaps not in a good way. Don’t do too much, but not too little either. Sometimes you might look too girlie, popular, wanna-be etc. If he reacts and you don’t think its real, he’s just doing it because you’re there and you’re a girl and he thinks he can do better, but let him know he can’t. If he is faking it, call his bluff and say something that makes him know you don’t think he is ‘all that’. For example, if he comes close, pull a face and offer him gum. This will unbalance his ego.
Start up conversations that have to do with if it’s where you are or if he’s talking to you. Make sure you don’t go on about nothing. Definitely make sense when you talk to him. Don’t twirl your hair, flick your eyelashes or giggle nonstop. He can get kind of scared and make fun of you, no matter how old you are, guys will always be the same. Be yourself. Just be who you are, that’s the #1 quality guys look for in a girl.